Wednesday, July 09, 2008

courage.

Art should astonish, transmute, transfix. One must work
at the tissue between truth and paranoia.
::: Brett Whiteley :::



I have been walking the line of my own personal artist paranoia... its so easy for me to get lost in my art at times that at some point I feel as if I must pull away so I can breath once more and regroup.

but sometimes when I do this I can become afraid and start to doubt my own creative nature and start to grind and pick at all the things that compel me to create in the first place...


To open up ones soul and let others look in is beautifully haunting. But Its so hard to see what others see in us... its easy to see the amazement in others but difficult to see in our self's. we come into this world willing to except everything at face value then as we grow we learn about likes and dislikes... truth and paranoia if you will.

I have been questioning my life and how I live it, in this year there has been both birth and death in my family... I am on the verge of having my youngest son starting high school just as my oldest daughter embarks on her senior year... I know that soon I will have to let her go, so she can grow into the wonderful woman that she is meant to be. But still I have a tinge of sadness to see my kids grow up into young adults. I miss there skinned knees and there messy little hands.


I see that my life is opening into a new stage and just as I have some fear, I know for sure that there are amazing things ahead for me. I have been so blessed to be able to share my passion to create... and so fortunate to have people enjoy seeing what I do.


we create, we grow, we love, we change, we mess up! but we live and find new hopes and dreams.


courage to change is a gift that we can only give to our self.




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6 comments:

Maija said...

You have such a gift, Ruth!
If anyone is leaving you nasty messages, I'm going to kick their ass!
ox

Cindy Dean said...

I totally understand where you are coming from...I wish you peace in your heart. Kepp creating all the wonderful things you do!

Jacquelines blog said...

Gorgeous work Ruth! Sorry to hear that you are feeling sad!

Julie said...

A very moving post Ruth and beautiful artwork.

lori said...

I understand all too well that fine line of artist paranoia, that you were talking about {well said}. I often wondered if it were just me who felt this way..so glad you share your gifts & words with us, they are precious.

HappyDayArt! said...

I hear you! Great post Ruth!

Catherine